Honour and Let Go - A New Year's Resolution

As 2025 dawns, it brings with it an opportunity for fresh starts, reflection, and resolution. For many, this means decluttering their homes, refocusing on health, or reconnecting with loved ones. But what about the emotional and spiritual weight we carry? This year, consider a deeply meaningful resolution: finally deciding on a permanent resting place for the ashes of a loved one or pet that have been sitting around the house for months, perhaps even years.
I am constantly amazed by the number of people who tell me they are in this situation .

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There are numerous reasons for why we put off dealing with cremains. Life just gets busy or we were so overwhelmed with dealing with all the details surrounding the passing of a loved one that it was easy to put off the final stage. 

Sometimes making the decision about their final resting place can feel like an unbearable responsibility when the pain of loss is so fresh. Perhaps the departed did not make their final wishes known and it is now up to us to try our best to guess what they would have wanted.

​While these reasons are valid, they often leave us carrying the emotional weight of unfinished grief. The good news? Taking this step doesn’t have to be daunting—it can be a deeply healing and empowering process.

The Benefits of Finalizing a Resting Place

1. Honoring Their Memory: Choosing a beautiful urn or scattering their ashes in a meaningful place is a way to honor the love and connection you shared. It creates a lasting tribute that reflects their unique spirit.
2. Creating Closure: Finalizing this decision provides a sense of resolution. It’s not about “moving on” from grief but finding a way to carry it with peace.
3. A Fresh Start for the New Year: Letting go of unfinished emotional tasks can free you to embrace the year ahead with a lighter heart. It’s a symbolic way of making space for new beginnings.
4. Strengthening Connections: If the ashes belong to a loved one or pet shared by your family, this process can bring everyone together. It’s an opportunity to share stories, memories, and perhaps even heal old tensions.

Taking the First Step
If you’ve been putting off this decision, New Year’s Day is the perfect moment to act. Here’s how you can get started:

1. Reflect on Their Memory: Think about what they loved. Were they drawn to nature? Did they have a favourite color, style, or place? These reflections can guide you toward choosing an urn or ceremony that feels deeply personal.
2. Explore Your Options: Today’s urns are as diverse as the lives they commemorate. From handcrafted ceramics to biodegradable options for scattering, there’s something for every preference. Don’t rush—take time to find the right fit. I am more than happy to help you with this process.
3. Talk to Family: If the decision involves others, initiate a conversation. Share your thoughts and listen to theirs. This can be a meaningful way to connect and collaborate.
4. Set a Date: Once you’ve chosen an urn or plan, set a date for the scattering or placement. Mark it on the calendar, and treat it as a sacred moment.
5. Give Yourself Grace: This process can stir up emotions. Allow yourself to feel them and know that it’s all part of the journey toward healing.

Moving Into the New Year with Peace
Starting the New Year by honoring the memory of your loved one or pet is a powerful act of love and self-care. It’s a resolution that not only honors the past but also frees you to step into the future with a lighter, more open heart.

So, as you sit down to write your resolutions, consider making this meaningful choice part of your list. This year, let’s transform a lingering task into a heartfelt tribute and a path to peace together.
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Happy New Year, and may 2025 bring healing, joy, and renewal for you and your family. I hope to hear from you soon.

Author
Rae Delai is an Australian small business owner of White Lily Urns and specializes in custom artisan ceramic funerary art. She has 30 plus years experience as a critical care and palliative care nurse which means she is very comfortable discussing all aspects of death, dying and grief.